Eyeballing it.

Non-photographer Francesco Capponi:

“Photography has completely changed since its beginnings; it is now available to everyone. While this has opened a myriad of new possibilities, at the same time it has also left photographer devoid of a large part of its original magic. Taking pictures has become a daily and often repetitive gesture, and today most photos are taken with a phone. If there is no emotions in the creative act, then we can’t expect to find it in the image that is created.”

Photography and I have often times been in a love-hate relationship.

Strange considering I trained as one. I am part of a system of visual saturation as both a viewer and a contributor and sometimes I just don’t know if I want that anymore.

Over the years on this blog I have submitted a trove of photographs and waited to see their impact, I’ve both curated and slapdashed it and slowly as time has gone on, I have left it to go to seed. Partly as Instagram has taken over the role as my visual journey document, the place people can see and assess and like and approve and envy and know that I’m living my best life (yuck), and partly because I’ve stopped thinking about why and what I create. Its an uneasy feeling, not knowing why you do the things you do, and not knowing whether you have anything to say when you have always been a person who has carried BYO’ed a soapbox to every major (and minor) event throughout your life. Yet here I am.

So for the sake of resetting and starting again I am going back to the roots of what I’ve always loved. I’ve always loved wonder and discovery and play – I frequently eyeball it when I’m halfway up a climbing wall – with mixed success. At the same time I find it difficult to articulate the point of it. At 28 years old it seems difficult to justify a part-time job while I ‘play’ (though deep down I believe in a 4 day work week but that is a discussion for another time). Last year I hoped to have a structured year of play, and yet haven’t managed to commit to a routine.

I’ve held on to the idea of needing to articulate something in particular, to justify it before I even begin the process of knowing what these small efforts will lead to.

Maybe I need to let go of that.

And that is going to be hard.

 

 

 

 

 

I am a person who loves books.

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